Falling Over

I hired a personal trainer today! I'll meet with him at my gym once a week for the next three months. He "worked my legs" today, and let me tell ya, I can hardly walk. Several times during the workout when I would finish a set of something-er-other, my legs would buckle. It's really a miracle I could drive home. He worked my legs so hard! I can't wait to do it again and try some other muscles.

I haven't exactly been motivated lately, so I'm hoping that this will really help me get back into the swing of things full-on. It's not as easy to eat chocolate chip cookies when just walking to the cupboard makes you nearly fall over!

Confessions Again

My first confession is that its True Confessions Monday again at the Sisterhood and I haven't blogged since the last one.

I also haven't done anything good since then. Didn't eat well, didn't exercise.

That's right, no Shredding at all last week. Or gym. Or anything. So much for Shredding every day.

I missed Days 11-18 of the 21 Day Challenge. I pretty much just need to start over. And I did so good the first bit.

And not today either because, well, it's my one day a month that I never make myself do anything... ya know, Sisters? Is this day as big a deal to the rest of the female population or is it just bad because mine have always been bad?

I could list all the food confessions - but it would just make you crave bad stuff, so I won't. But the birthday cake is finally gone.

Tomorrow is my sisters birthday and I'm hosting her party at my house. And making cake. But I'll make her take the leftovers back to her house to fatten up her house mates instead of me.

True Confessions Monday at the Sisterhood

My "Weekend Warrior" plans didn't go quite as well as I planned. But it wasn't awful.

My birthday is Wednesday and I plan on eating cake ... and plenty of it.

I am doing well on my 21 Day Challenge to have a good attitude about exercise, but I did miss a day last week. Bummer!

I feel guilty about wanting to blow off dieting on my birthday. I want to WANT to eat well. But my desire to eat crap still wins sometimes.

I have big plans for Shredding every day this week. I am ready to be ... even just as skinny as I was before my miscarriage.

Weekend Worries OR Warriors ??

Weekends are hard on everybody - diet wise - I think. A weekend is cause to celebrate and celebrating is cause for eating. So this weekend my goal is just to eat less crap than usual. I know, I know, maybe that's setting the bar too low. But I've been doing really well lately and I don't want to blow that. So I won't overdo it.

Last night hubby and I had pizza on our Friday Night Date. Today I am going to be pretty good. It's just a normal day around here really since my hubby is working. Tomorrow, Sunday, is a family birthday party for me. So I'm not cooking and I AM celebrating. I'll eat whatever my MIL makes and I'll eat cake. But first thing Monday morning, Jillian will be Shredding me again.

Maybe planning your diet "failures" is the way to go. This way I don't feel like I "failed" on my "diet" I feel like I made choices about what is worth skipping and what is worth enjoying. What do you think?

Shredding Day 2

I skipped a day of shredding, but today I did my Day 2 (I exercised yesterday, just didn't Shred). I'd say it was about the same as Day 1. But it was nice to know what to expect. Jillian really does seem to know just when I'm about poop out on her. And she says just the right thing to keep me going. I know she sometimes gets a bad rap - but I appreciate her! I realize I may be singing a different song after Day 12 or something...

I'm doing really well on eating lately, too. Breakfast has never been a problem for me (my kids eat Cheerios, so I do too). For lunch I've been having a filling salad (broccoli, cheese, turkey, Romaine, carrots, etc) or a yogurt with high-protein granola, sometimes a Turkey wrap. Smoothies or Jell-O for an afternoon snack. And dinner I don't stress about too much either. I try to feed my family healthy foods anyway and when it's something ... well, like pizza... I just don't eat very much of that and have some more salad to fill up. I'm feeling pretty good.

Tonight is my bookclub and I have to find something healthy to bring to it... maybe I should Tweet for suggestions.

The Shredding Begins

My copy of Jillian's 30 Day Shred arrived today and I jumped right into it this evening. Holy. Friggin. Cow! I'm not a big sweater, but I was dripping. I mean, like flinging sweat across the room sweating! Sheesh! I can definitely see how you could loose 20 pounds in 30 days. The only problem with that plan is that I won't be able to walk tomorrow, let alone do that work out again!!! But I will give it my all. Because... well, do I really need to explain? 20 pounds in 30 days!!!

Living Life

Yesterday I did well. My sister, Ruth, is living with us right now and she is great because she's one of those people who like to exercise. So that kinda rubs off on me since I'm around her. We did a "Total Body Sculpt with Gilade" last night off FitTV. Today I have a new something-er-other recorded that I'm going to try. And tomorrow my copy of Jillian's 30 Day Shred arrives. So, life is looking good as far as potential for good exercising. (And in pretty much every other way, too, I guess!)

Passing Time

Yeah, yeah, so it's been nearly a month since I blogged here. I had 20 houseguests for two weeks. And getting ready for that was stressful and took all my spare time. But now, 3 pounds heavier, it's time to re-focus.

My body has gone back to looking pretty lumpy. That last challenge was a total loss for me. I lost a whopping 1 pound somewhere in there, but it didn't last. I have a new perspective now. My goal is to change my attitude. Then behavior will come naturally after that. (Or so I hope) I don't want to look at my exercise as a "chore" each day. I want to look forward to it and crave it.

The Sisterhood is doing a new challenge. A 21 Day Challenge. You see, it takes 21 days to start a new habit. So the habit I'm working on forming is my good attitude. Today is Day One for me even though The Sisterhood started a few days ago. I'm not going to watch the scale as closely as I did in the previous challenge. I'm focusing on the habit - not the outcome. I mean, not that I'm not hoping for some serious "outcome", but that's just not my daily focus.

Here we go again, people.

Granola Wisdom

Some wise words from the back of my granola box:

It's not important how far away your goal is - just that you're moving toward it.

Weigh In #6

I'm at 156.2 this week. That's up from last week but still down from my starting weight.

Honestly, I deserve for that number to be much higher. I didn't do well this week until Monday. But on Monday I kicked it into seriously high gear and worked myself until I could hardly walk or sit up. Rolling over in bed is painful because my stomach muscles are like mush. My legs feel like they're going to give out on me every time I stand up. But it's such a good kind of pain. It's so good to feel that tired!

Last Week's Goals:
Go to the gym 3 times - Definitely did NOT do this. In fact, I didn't go a single time. I need to amend this goal to include home workouts since I've been doing that more often lately.
Do 100 sit-ups in one evening - Did it! I got home at 9:45 last night and really didn't want to, but I did it. It took me until 11, but I did it!
Don't over-do the eating on the holiday weekend. - Definitely failed on this one. Nuff said.

This Week's Goals:
4 Serious workouts (home or gym)
Try jumping rope again
Loose weight!!!!! Use that simple equation of calories in, calories out.

I'm still feeling pretty frustrated that in six weeks of being pretty serious about weight-loss I haven't gotten very far. But at this point, that frustration is only driving me to work harder. I'll beat my body at this game if it's the last thing I do!!!!

Weekend Worries

On the weekends it's always harder to maintain a good healthy diet and exercise plan. This weekend was especially bad since the weekend was actually 4 days for me and because it was a holiday. It's always amazing to me how many holiday traditions are food-based. Plus there's just that feeling of "I want to party" that also means food.

Anyway, it was bad. But this is a new day. And today I've got my will power back in control and I've got my "hard workin' Mama" hat back on. The past is the past. Or, as they say in Kung Fu Panda:

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That's why they call it the present!

Weigh In Week 5

I'm finally DOWN!!!! I'm at 155.6 this week which is a 1 pound loss from the start 5 weeks ago.

I'm thrilled about the loss. I worked hard this week and actually accomplished all my goals (more about that later). I really am happy. But at the same time, in the back of my head, there is a nagging depression because I've only lost 1 pound in 5 weeks. Really? ONE pound in FIVE weeks! That's not good! But I'll try to not dwell on that. I'll accept the positive (the loss) and ignore the negative. I'll try to see this as the beginning of my body making the changes it needs to in order to loose weight.

Last Weeks Goals:
Go to the gym 3 times - I did it! I finally went to the gym 3 times this week, and look! A loss!
Minimize carbs - I did great on this. I didn't eliminate carbs. I just tried to be aware of places that I could easily cut them some.
Healthy snacking only during the day, with a tiny treat at night - I can only think of one time that I splurged this past week. And I'm OK with one tiny (candy bar) splurge. A girl's gotta live it up sometimes, right!?!
Don't loose momentum!!! - I totally did this one, too. It wasn't easy, but I do feel like I kept my momentum up this week.

I feel very, very good about how I did on all my goals. Yeah!

This Weeks Goals:
Go to the gym 3 times (which is going to be very, very hard considering my schedule)
Do 100 sit-ups in one evening (I tried to do this last night and could only get to 50 before pooping out)
Don't over-do the eating on the holiday weekend.

No overly lofty goals this week. I leave tomorrow for a camping trip with a bunch of teenage girls and I am a chaperon. I won't be in control of what I eat there. And then as soon as I get back it's the 4th of July and we have big family plans for that day. Most of my goal-accomplishing will be done at the start of next week. But that's what this is all about, right? Learning to change my lifestyle so that being healthy can be a part of it. Not just changing my daily routine for a couple of weeks to drop a few pounds.

Goal Accomplished!

I did it! I went to the gym three times this week! It was hard, and I didn't want to, but I went today. I really wanted to just tell myself I'd work out at home - but I know that most of the time when I tell myself that it won't really happen. Or it'll be half-a**ed. I just do better at the gym. The kids aren't there to distract me. I feel better there and work harder there.

I feel very good about having accomplished that goal that I've been shooting for for more than 4 weeks now. I hope that having done it once will make it easier to do it again.

No matter what the scale says for my weigh in tomorrow, I'll feel good about it because I'll know I worked hard.

Note To Self

Note to self: You DO actually like going to the gym. But only on the days that you really push yourself and are proud of your work. So GO and WORK HARD! It feels good!

Before and ... not quite After yet

I recently came across this picture of me from three Summer's ago. It is horrid! Nightmarish! Ick! Granted, it's a bad angle and I'm doing a funny pose, but it's pretty scary. My legs, my neck, my arms! All so fluffy! And this is BEFORE I had baby #3! So it only got worse from here. I think I got pregnant again like the next month (my boys are only 13 months apart).


Below is me in January of this year at one of my best points. Sure, I'm more covered up, but you can see that I have a chin. My legs are slimmer. I look more fit. In fact, I AM more fit!

I was working hard at this point to loose weight. And I was having success. I felt so good when I got dressed in the morning. People who know me noticed and complimented me. I'm not just seeking compliments, but it was nice to have my hard work validated by their compliments.

It's good to remind myself that when I get serious about this, my body obeys. It just takes sticking with it. Some consistency. Hard work. Sweat. Emotional strength. The point is, it CAN be done.

Weigh In #4

Only 4 more weigh in's to go in this challenge!!!

Well, after my hiatus last week/weekend, things aren't so pretty. The good news is that I've lost 3 pounds in 3 days, but the bad news is that still leaves me up .8 from last week. Today I'm at 157.6.

Last weeks goals:
I didn't go to the gym 3 times - but I did go Monday, and yesterday and today I worked out at home (post-hiatus).
I definitely didn't eat minimal snacks. I snacked my toosh off (or should I say ON?). But, I've done really really well the last 3 days.
I didn't exactly minimize my carbs, but I did become more aware of how carbaholic I am.

This Weeks Goals:
Go to the gym 3 times (I know this has been my goal for 3 weeks now and I have yet to do it, but I am seriously determined right now. I'm SURE I can do it this time!)
Minimize carbs
Healthy snacking only during the day, with a tiny treat at night
Don't loose momentum!!!

I really regret having fallen so far off the wagon last week. It was silly and petty. No more of that nonsense from me!

Hiatus

I took a small hiatus the last half of last week. A hiatus from dieting and exercise. ... I know, not good.

But maybe it was good. I was discouraged and only kinda half doing it the few days before my hiatus. Now, after my hiatus, I am invigorated. I am fully ready to jump back in with both feet.

Today I exercised basically all day. I went to the gym in the morning - and worked harder and longer than I have in a while. I did sit-ups and leg lifts and such while watching my afternoon mindless-television. And this evening the kids wanted to play outside so I ran circles around the cul-de-sac while they played. I am exhausted. But I feel great! Really, really great!

I also ate really well today. No splurges at all, despite the fact that there are 3 different delectable treats in my house leftover from Father's Day (I won't tell you what they are so that you don't start craving them). I am going to have a treat this evening. Just a small one. I think treats are important for me. If I totally cut myself off from all treats I just end up binging.

So, like I said, I jumped in with both feet. Now, if I can just stay in, I'll be fine! I gotta start pulling my weight on Team Lime!!

Weigh In #3

GAIN. Enough said. No, just kidding, I have more to say. I gained only 0.2 pounds (putting me at 157). That would be good were it not for the fact that this is the second full week for me of exercising well and eating well and seeing basically no results.

I'm getting kind of tired of this. The reward for my hard work it supposed to be the satisfaction of seeing the scale go down and my muscles go up. I am seeing some of the muscles going up, but none of the scale going down. It's very, very frustrating.

This past week I did not overindulge or over-eat or over-anything! I went to the gym twice for good, long workouts and worked out at home for at least 20 minutes twice also. I didn't snack in the afternoon. I didn't snack in the evening. Basically, I DID EVERYTHING RIGHT! So why no loss?

Ugh. Whine fest. Sorry. I took the day off today - I didn't go to the gym, I ate what I wanted, etc. But I suppose tomorrow I'll get up and be good again. *sigh* I'm just not feeling very into it right now.

Last Weeks Goals:
I did NOT do the jump rope thing. Sorry. I just couldn't muster the desire after sucking at it so much.
I did NOT go to the gym 3 times. But I did go twice and get at least 2 home-workouts in.
I DID eat minimal snacks each day.

This Weeks Goals:
Go to the gym 3 times.
Eat minimal snacks (after today - I'm not counting today)
Minimize my carbs

I wonder if my carb-loving habits are the cause of some of this weight trouble. So this week I am going to work on that. Not that I'm going to cut them out or anything drastic like that. I'll just watch them and not over-do it.

*****
Sorry for the whiney post. Really. Today was a bad day. But I'm sure tomorrow will be better. I pray tomorrow will be better. I can't quit say that I'm sure tomorrow will be better, but I'm pretty confidant it will.

Oh, and GO TEAM LIME!!!

Lost Day

What happened to Thursday? It just kind of flew past me. I didn't exercise or even do my jump roping challenge. Shoot! Part of the busyness was that I hosted book club at my house last night. I made a semi-healthy snack and luckily nobody brought anything too ooey-gooey-chocolatey that I couldn't' resist. I'll call that a definite success.

Today is a pretty busy day, too. But I'm off to the gym first thing this morning so that I can't possibly miss out on it. And I'll get back to the jump roping tonight. I'm determined not to give up on it since I sucked at it so much. I will master that dang thing!

What to do at the gym today? ... I'm thinking elliptical and weights. It's been a while since I did some good weight lifting.

Weighing In

Well, I maintained my weight this past week. Not so much as a decimal of a change. 156.8. Still. But I think that means this next week will be all the more impressive. Bring on the elliptical, treadmill, weights, and jump rope!

Speaking of the jump rope, man do I suck at it. I tried to jump rope for just 10 minutes last night and totally failed. I can't jump more than 10 times or so without tripping on the rope! I've never felt so clumsy in my life! But I'll try again tonight ... and tomorrow ... and the next day. And hopefully by the end of a week I won't suck as much!

So my goals for the week are:
to jump rope for 10 minutes every day
go to the gym 3 times (already went once!)
eat minimal snacks every day

The snacking thing is tough since my body still is recovering from being pregnant. It still wants snacks pretty often. But I'll just try to have them be healthy, diet-neutral snacks.

Do or Donut

hehehehe - I'm so clever.... do or do not (donut) get it? I'm hysterical.

I had to bribe my children to get them to go to Target with me this morning. I told them they could pick out any treat while we were there. I was hoping I could steer them toward something that I don't really like that much so that I wouldn't be tempted by the goodies. But it didn't quite work out as I planned. We came home with powdered donuts. I am not dying for a donut, but if they're in the house I'm gonna have a hard time not eating them. During naptime, when all the world (or at least my house) is quiet for a few precious minutes, it's hard to not indulge. I've worked hard that morning. Don't I deserve a donut if it will make me feel better? Those donuts will call to me.

But I won't hear. Because I'll be too busy doing situps and lifting hand weights. And after naptime, it's off to the gym for us. Where I will think of those donuts being smashed to death on the tread of the treadmill with each of my steps.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all about enjoying the things that I love. I refuse to think of never eating a cookie again. I'll just not eat a dozen cookies. But donuts...I don't love donuts. So why waste my fat/calorie intake for the day on them?

Welcome to my Weight Loss Journey

I am starting this blog kind of as a journal of my weight loss. I don't expect it to be a popular, high-comment-receiving, thrilling blog. I expect it to help me stay motivated. I have limited time to loose weight right now before I plan on getting pregnant again. It's time to get serious!

Goals:
I currently weight 156.8. (That's right - I'm putting it out there for you to see.) My overall goal is to get back down to 130 (where I haven't been since my first baby was born, 5 years ago). But I'll be very, very happy if I can get down to 145 before I get pregnant again.

Reasons:
I want to feel good about my body again. I want to run after my children and not be exhausted. I want to feel the sense of accomplishment that comes with working hard and seeing results.

Trials:
Two weeks ago I was 10 weeks pregnant. I hadn't really exercised during those 10 weeks because of morning sickness. Then I miscarried. So getting back even to what I was 10 weeks ago is going to be hard (and slightly frustrating). I was at 152 before I got pregnant this last time.
I have three kids under 5. They are a bit of a ...shall we say, trial... in my weight loss journey. They suck away my energy, insist on snacking several times a day, beg for french fries and cookies, and take up a huge chunk of my time. But they also love to go play at the gym. So, some days they motivate me.
I actually really hate exercising. My body doesn't react to heat well and I tend to get close to fainting when working out. I have to be very careful about drinking almost nonstop as I exercise to prevent the fainting.

Assistance:
Well, this blog, of course.
I also belong to The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans, which is a great support network.
And my trusty gym membership.

If you want to know more about me personally, check out my family blog at worthfamily.blogspot.com